Well, Flame Grill my Whopper and call it Professor Caractacus Potts! Is there nothing sacred any more? Not even those precious moments when a man wants a little peace in the world so that he can go about his daily business without being disturbed? It seems not, but then the British always were a little strange. This is, apparently, the world's fastest toilet. Powered by a Boeing Jet engine, the $10,000 vehicle's top speed is in excess of 70mph, and it farts flames from its tailpipe - rather like, I would imagine, a man forced to eat ten vindaloos one after another.

There's a video, as well another pic of the flaming khazi in action and its inventor, Paul Stender, all after the jump.

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Not sure just how effective this will be, but you've got to admit that a portable anti-virus system can only be A Good Thing. This USB Virus Chaser, courtesy of Korean company Digiworks, is not the first anti-virus-system-in-a-USB, as they've been around for a couple of years (most notably Iocell's VaccineDrive). The Virus Chaser is around from this month in 2GB and 4GB versions. – Ad Dugdale

USB VIrus Chaser by Digiworks [Akihabara News]

Mehmet Erkök. The name sounds straight out of a Terry Gilliam movie and so do his customised Nokia phones, which is the sort of retro technology that you could have seen in 12 Monkeys. The orange one could have even made it in Barbarella no, not a Terry Gilliam movie but it has Jane Fonda running around half-naked, like these modded mobiles. Erkök is not a time traveller, though, but a lecturer at the Department of Industrial Product design in the Istanbul Teknik Üniversitesi, in Turkey. The picture of the blue one after the jump makes me want one. Now.

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The LawnBott may look like Arnold Schwarznegger's cycling helmet, but it's actually a cordless, remote-controlled lawnmower with a flat blade that mulches the grass as it cuts it. Charge it up on its docking station and it will go for 4 hours—or 33,000 square feet—on one single charge. It's apparently so quiet that you can let it run all night without bugging the neighbors, it doesn't mind a bit of light rain, and a heavier shower will send it toddling back to its base station like the obedient little robot it is.

It does hills—anything up to a 1:4 gradient, in fact—and only uses around $7 to $10 of electricity each year. The downside is the price: the LB2000 Professional will set you back $1,749. – Ad Dugdale

Press Release [Productivity Inc. via Sci-Fi Tech]

Think you're the business on a virtual race track? Xbox is organising a big one-night tournament to be held on the big screen at Hoyts Entertainment Quarter (aka Fox Studios), Sydney, on May 23rd. Get yourself signed up right here for a spot on the knock-out roster, with the final eight players showing their moves on the big screen in front of the whole crowd. All Forza 2 action too, three weeks before official release in mid June.

If you love this racing stuff, get your name on the list fast — first 400 not only get the night of big screen racing action, but a sneak preview screening of '28 Weeks Later'... sequel to the great Sandra Bullock film, '28 Days'. Oh, sorry? Right. Correction. That's the sequel to the zombie thriller '28 Days Later'. -Seamus Byrne

[ Xbox 360 Forza 2 Big Screen Racing Challenge ]

They make some of the coolest technology carry bags around and they're from Melbourne, so it made sense that they'd put in a good showing. The quirkiest booth of the lot, come 4.00pm it was turned into a party zone as some good quality beer started flowing freely (and soft stuff of the Red Bull variety for sober travellers).

Add a big batch of giveaways and it was a stellar way to end the day. They taunted the gathered folk with the announcement of their next Beer for Bags promo — where you can buy specific beers to trade-in at Crumpler stores for their bags. But the announcement was for Toronto and New York. Bastards. More Beer for Bags scheduled for later this year here in Oz.

Party pics after the jump.

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When you try and pull out the required TENS OF THOUSANDS (last look this had just broken $20,000), you can tell your S.O. it is for charity. Sick kids need your years salary!

It really is an awesome piece of work. Airbrushed Halo 3 art, signed by the team at Bungie.

This isn't the first of the Konsoles for Kids charity auctions, with the earlier consoles getting a mix response — some going below retail. But they were 'damaged', particularly the Kerri-Anne Kennerley Konsole, and does anyone really support the Queensland Reds? I'm sure this Halo 3 result is sure to make up for the mediocre earlier responses. The global response is such that they're offering an NTSC console to the winner if necessary.

Check out the buyer information to see some of the recent auctions. -Seamus Byrne

[ The Halo 3 Xbox 360 auction ]

I've tinkered with screen prints and thermal prints and the rest, but getting a great result from your own designs is pretty hit and miss. There have been a few recent showings of fabric printing (I saw it at an HP show in Singapore a couple of years ago), but they've been slow to translate to fabrics actually being available for purchase.

Now Giclee Media Supplies are distributing a US fabric type, with its special coating that lets you drop it into a standard inkjet and go for it. They used the Epson 9800 on this example on their stand, and it looked awesome — not my taste in a skirt, but I'm not one for pastels when I hit the town.

Apparently you can choose from lots of fabrics (this is a silk), or even send them your own which they will treat and add the necessary paper backing to (you remove the paper after printing, unless you like the feel of paper on your skin... no, I don't want to know). -Seamus Byrne

[ Giclee Media Supplies ]

Now that the BlackBerry Curve has been officially announced, you're probably wondering how it is. We've got you covered. Here's a roundup of all the curve reviews on the net.

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A lot of the show has some spectacular paper on display. 100% cottons, watercolours, silver film, lightbox film, canvas. All for use in inkjets with standard inkjet ink (read: don't go messing around with shitty 3rd-party inks here — use the real stuff and you'll get what you paid for).

But of course, I can't really show you on a screen. I'll do what I can, but this is about the finish, the polish, the texture. C'mon, reach out and touch it through your screen if you think you can.

Anyway, it's all about the fancy coatings, really, that is how these gorgeous materials can be used in your inkjet even though they look compeletely incompatible. Like the fabric in the entry... -Seamus Byrne

[ Stand in the picture is paper by Canson Arches ]
Local distributor [Kayell]

And this is the middle brother in the family! 2.2m across, this bad boy from Broncolor has a ring flash into the parabola, and funnily enough it's used in the highest end of photography — fashion. Oh, and furniture. Basically, if you need to light the subject all around, then you need something this big. Or maybe the bigger 3.3m option.

There is monster-sized flash lighting gear all over the place here at PMA 07, but this caught my eye first so it gets dibs. -Seamus Byrne

Local Broncolor distributor [Baltronics]

Wired has an interesting follow-up piece about Harry McCracken's resignation from PC World. Crawford's blog says that "We have and will continue to run editorial and content that both praises and criticizes as appropriate without regard to the vendor relationship."

But then a statement from IDG's Howard Sholkin: "The reason is that Colin and Harry had a disagreement on one opinion piece related to Apple and they could not come to a settlement as to how the differences should be resolved so Harry felt that necessitated him resigning." Hello IDG knuckleheads: The fact that management even has a say in editorial matters is wrong.

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These tricky folks have made some specially layered papers that take you back to your childhood bedroom, delivering glow in the dark goodness that's ready for your inkjet printer.

Dubbed Moonglow, the range has five colour options so you can make the starfield of your dreams (hell, just cut it out if that's what you want to do), printing up larger space objects for that photo finish.

They do a lot of A4 sheets, but you can also buy in rolls to suit huge printers — the guy on the stand was telling me about using this to print backdrops for bands. ROCK! They sell direct through the site. More images of other colours after the jump.

[ Moonglow ]

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We covered the GelaSkins laptop art skins for your MacBook and MacBook Pro before, but they've just released a bunch of new designs so we're featuring them again. The Mario and Luigi one is still one of our favorites, but we can't say no to some of the other ones either.

Browse through the 30 or so designs and you'll find one you like as well.

The Gallery [Gizmodo]

Product Page [GelaSkins]

We were kind of skeptical of the Moto ROKR E6 Linux phone at first glance, but after watching the video and seeing what we can do, there may be room for this in our pockets yet. Noah from PhoneDog gives you a walkthrough of the ROKR E6's UI, complete with an Apple iPhone skin that he installed himself.

All in all, Noah says the phone isn't very polished, you can't go into widescreen mode, but it does run Linux and have some nice hardware features. Since it doesn't "rock as hard as it should", he's sending this back to Asia where it came from. You can make up your own decision though. – Jason Chen

Phonedog [Threebase]

Greenpeace reponds to El Jobso's letter declaring Apple a greener company. All that sweet talk just ain't enough for the tree humpers. (Not even the promise of LED backlit LCDs? Ok, fine.) According to their scale, the new measures will bring Apple to a 5.0 on their 10 point scale (that's up from the 2.7 they were ranked at before.)

We're no experts on what's green and what puts the toxic nipple clamp on Mother Earth's sweet teat. But the entire statement is after the jump if you wish to investigate the words straight from the hippie's mouth:

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We're in and wandering the floor here now, and it is a relieving size when compared with CeBIT Sydney. But almost everywhere you turn there is cool stuff to check out. As ever, the big question is what's new. Let's go find out. -Seamus Byrne

Flash drives of all brands and sizes could with a lanyard nowadays, but how many are already hidden into the lanyard itself? This looks like an average lanyard on the outside, but unfasten the clip to find the USB flash drive with 2GB of memory available for taking your donkey porn collection anywhere! It isn't too bad of a deal either—2GB for $38. –Travis Hudson

Product Page [Via Red Ferret]

Remember that PSP and PS3 update we told you about earlier last month? The one that enabled you to share PlayStation One game saves between your PS3 and your PSP? Well, Sony's finally gone and enabled it, you know, officially.

The handful of compatible titles are: "2Xtreme, Crash Bandicoot, Destruction Derby, Jet Moto, Jumping Flash, MediEvil, Rally Cross, Syphon Filter, Tekken 2 and WipeOut." If you've already purchased this for the PSP, you can re-download them for the PS3 for free. Now for your scheduled PSP licking. – Jason Chen

PS Store Update [Kotaku]

We know what you're trying to do, AMD. You're trying to steal Intel's thunder by announcing your new M690 mobile chipset before Intel goes live with theirs. You're tempting us by telling us it'll deliver a 25% boost in battery life (that's over 5 hours) and that you'll be partnering with Nvidia (over your own child ATI) and Broadcom for integrated graphics and wireless. And y'know something, it works. But we're still gonna wait and see what Intel has to offer. Just 'cause you never know what else is out there. – Louis Ramirez

Press Release

Just arrived here for the show. Slow start as they have delayed opening until 10.30am, but there is a big crowd here ready to barrel through the doors Stella McCartney sale style as soon as they bang the gong.

Brought my own Internets today, so we should be flowing nicely. -Seamus Byrne

The folks at Nerdy Shirts have taken the spectacle that is HD DVD on Digg and turned it into a shirt. Yes, you too can be reminded day after day (if you never change your shirts) of the code that launched a thousand stories.

Have your fun now, because in a few months you'll have to explain what those hex numbers mean to everyone you meet. But for today, you sir are the nerd pop culture king. – Jason Chen

Product Page [Nerdy Shirts]

Seriously, this was exactly what this guy (also on the Made in Germany stand) was saying to the kid in the picture. "No, no, it isn't a game, it is a driving simulator." Doesn't that just mean it is a BORING version of a driving game?

But the kid just wouldn't be dismissed so easily. "How do you score?", "What's the goal?", "Where are the hookers to boost your health?" I made that last one up. Have to give the kid a break, though. There was a pretty serious looking joystick attached to the machine. How could it NOT be a game to a 12-year-old kid? Oh yeah, and he crashed a lot too. He was rubbish at it. -Seamus Byrne

This eye tracking gear on the Made in Germany stand was cool, if just to see this German guy hanging around wearing it. No getting away with checking out passing ladies, because the screen would give it away by showing exactly where his eyes were wandering. Thankfully he wasn't too close to the spa girls.

Picture of the computer screen after the jump.

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So here are those girls in the spa I mentioned earlier. They were showing off some new mobile phone protective covers called 'Skins'... basically, large condoms you wrap your phone in before hitting the water, or mud, or jelly. Y'know, whatever.

Another photo follows the drop, showing a small number of the non-stop flow of men hovering around the spa. -Seamus Byrne

[Skins Mobile]

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Spend a little too long at your desk? Of course you do. These tables will do your back the world of good, letting you raise and lower your desk so you can shift between sitting and standing over the course of the day. Even low enough to sit on a swiss ball or kneel now and then if that takes your fancy. It's all about saving your back!

Your back, and your rat's nest of cables too. The arms and legs have cable channels, and under the back edge of the desk you can add an electricals duct, where six power points can live so you only need a single cable running away from the desk to your outlet. Neat, tidy, sexy, smart. And Aussie.

These are made by a crew in Melbourne, and the tables start at $1900 and flow up to over $4000 with all the bells and whistles seen on this desk here. Plus they can do all kinds of customisations to suit your exact needs. My back is already trying to remind me to go order one now. More close up pics around the table after the jump.

[ AME Systems ]

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Just across the way from D-Link was the Netcomm stand. I mentioned their NB12WD update on Monday, but outside that most of their range on show was best serving bigger infrastructure needs. There was this rather weird looking outdoor 802.11g access point, though, which looks like some kind of small planter box for a midget triffid.

Good long cable though! -Seamus Byrne

The one that points it all in the right direction! Which finger did you think I meant?

A cool mix of gear on the D-Link stand here at CeBIT for those who want to tweak the hell out of their wireless networks. This omni will help shoot your network into the nastier reaches of your zone. It's about 3x stronger than standard antennae. Like a bunker buster for Wi-Fi.

More gear for you wireless network nuts after the jump. 

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Like Panasonic, Sony's presence was very corporate, the highlight of which was this intelligent video monitoring solution, which would highlight points of motion, effectively picking out people and tracking them in the frame.

There was also a new HD video conferencing system. Why? Because you can!

The HD video system and a close up on the video tracking are both lurking beyond the jump. -Seamus Byrne

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PPC was an exhibitor in the 'Supply Chain Management' area of the show. Not exactly where I expected to find anything of interest, but the darker parts of the mind leapt into action when I saw this machine.

These guys do all-in-one ID card printers. Every part of the process — magnetic stripes, photos, ID info, all that sort of thing. So you start with a stack of blank cards, and you end up with official IDs. Yes, it's all in the name of business IDs, but if you had the dough and the creativity, you could have yourself quite the supply of ID to suit all occasions.

I'm just saying. I actually think that would be very dodgy. And illegal if you tried to do anything dumb. But it could be fun for the right joke. Or for starting an official cool kids club. -Seamus Byrne

We checked in on the Google stand, which was little more than signs, a bunch of laptops, and some reps. What does an online company show off at a trade show anyway?

They were really there selling both sides of their ad business — AdWords and AdSense. Riveting stuff. Across the aisle was one of their partners, though, with some cool Google-brand server appliances. Probably the nicest racks I've ever seen. Image after the jump... and get your mind out of the gutter. It's not that sort of rack!

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Apart from the awesome 108-inch plasma, a return visit to the Panasonic stand revealed not all that much of interest to Gizmodo folk. But if you want to have a squiz, follow the fold to find some more pictures from around their zone. Lots of screens, all with a biz/corp angle. -Seamus Byrne

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Holy crap. I have been given a rare glimpse into the mind of Gizmodo readers, and I didn't know what I was getting into. You people are completely insane.

I asked earlier for you to Photoshop a picture of French Linux Codemeister Michel Xhaard in humourous situations. What I received ... well, you'll just need to see for yourself. There are a few that are great and exactly what I was looking for, a few that kind of miss the point, and a few that make me weep for humanity. All entries are below, and since this contest had no prizes or promises of prizes, I think it's safe to declare that there are no winners here today. Only a bunch of twisted minds and one generous Frenchman who has been besmirched for no real reason.

I'm sorry, Michel. Can you find it in your heart for forgive us?

–Adam Frucci

PC World's US Editor in Chief, Harry McCracken, has resigned. The reason he resigned — the company's CEO killing a story entitled "Ten Things We Hate About Apple" — shows how the magazine's editorial is fighting hard to keep its integrity, and that McCracken's departure shows that he's not going to put up with this crap.

You see, CEO Crawford apparently told editors that their reviews and articles were too critical of the vendors — the same vendors who advertise in their magazine. Hence, the order came down that they "had to start being nicer to advertisers."

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Got a lot of messages to leave for your family? Don't like writing? Then this message magnet is for you. The unit comes with six small photo frames where you can put in pictures of your whole family in order to easily identify them when you need to leave them a message.

Each message can be up to 10 seconds long, which should be long enough to tell them to pick up milk, eggs, or whatever else you think you need to say. Our only complaint is the lack of support for alternative families — Paul Reiser and Greg Evigan would be disappointed. – Jason Chen

Product Page [Discovery via Random Good Stuff]

For the most part, speakers this small never sound good, but we won't judge until we try, and with looks like this, how could we not wanna try? The credit card–sized VX-818 is 1.3cm thick and it connects to any Bluetooth-enabled gadget doubling as a speaker or a hands-free device. Don't have a Bluetooth phone? You can also connect via a miniUSB port, standard audio jacks, and both line-in and line-out jacks. The VX-818 also has touch-sensitive controls (what sexy gadget doesn't nowadays). No word on pricing, but we wouldn't mind having one of these in our gadget bag. – Louis Ramirez

Product Page [via SlashPhone]

The Happy-Kid webcam, from the fine folks at Brando is definitely happy. It bends around to attach to the top of your monitor in a variety of happy poses. It is ironic that such a cheerful and happy webcam is used to film you and your sick and disgusting Web shows. $US19. –Travis Hudson

Product Page [Brando]

Bose recently sent their new in-car media centre to regulators at the US Federal Communications Commission for testing. The car they sent it in? A Ferrari 612 Scaglietti. Bose sure knows how to wow 'em, eh? You can't distract us from your product, Bose, no matter how much you try!

Their Media Centre uses Gracenote and AMG metadata to figure out what exactly it is you're listening to, and loads up with maps from Navteq. It also has a TV tuner, which is sure to be one of the more dangerous additions to the car-electronics lineup in some time. –Adam Frucci

Bose Filing [FCC]